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There are times when you wonder why? Why go?.
already did not nothing, I had no desire to move on and is that why should I do? The only people I had were my parents ... and if they did not want me around Who would?.
Stephanie was one of the people closest to it, for even had brothers ... Not anymore. My grandparents lived in Canada too old to contact them. I had no one able to intercede for me, anyone who avoid the most dire consequences.
the days following that avoids Jason as ever, followed me, but I knew I did not desirable, it was a disaster for him, it hurt. And I. .. After much reflection, I realized that was stupid of me not understanding the reality that Jason was the best I could take my life, but reject the idea ... always.
wounded did not want me .. I was afraid to fall in love, to succumb to the networks of the web of engagement. I had been deceived, I had stopped by Natalie either when most had needed a shoulder to mourn, and since then, I promised I would not fall into the same trap of unhappiness.
My heart is crushed by bitterness, hatred and spite, with minimal clean and healthy eating, which was responsible for protecting me in a personal and rough shell in which I allowed myself to feel like everyone else.
aisles full of people, now departed and accusatory looks strange after that Natalie and Jason, then I seem nostalgic looks of love. Little miss to go with my aunt Meredith, just a couple of weeks.
do not even tolerate the company of Stephanie. Every time I was more lonely, more crestfallen.
could not help but mourn from time to time ... And after all that mourn years after the death of Jeremy, now had a new reason why embitter existence. All happened to me was as if fate would not let him anything to anyone, but would definitely be speaking on the case to deprive them of misfortunes.
Jason was chasing me, not withdrawing it. But I did not want to talk ... And I did until the day that you hear by Stephanie on my way to boarding school.
-Melanie. "she said breathlessly on the last day of classes in the beginning Christmas holiday season.
-Jason.-whispered staring at his beautiful blue eyes.
respondes. "At last she said with a bitter smile. I could not stand how beautiful it looked almost hurt.
Jason "I ... .. I siento." I apologized shunning his penetrating gaze.
-Mel, do not disculpes. "He said standing in front of me .- ...- Come to a bank I took away from the entrance of the school, which stood a scrawny, twisted tree that gave a warm shadow at his feet, but I sat down.
- What do you mean Jason? .- Asked.
-Yo ... He said the internado.-pale.
-Jason ... I swear I do not want to go, and I would like that ... I supieras. "I said with difficulty swallowing.
" You do not want Mel go, I know. And I do not want vayas. "He said hugging me from behind. He his chin on my head and I climbed the mirada. "And do not let you go Melanie.-whispered in my ear.
- No? And how do you think about it? .- Muttered.
"We escaparemos.-whispered. I laughed at such a foolish idea.
"You .. Do you have a vague idea of \u200b\u200bthe number of people who are available for my parents to monitor my movements? .- I said chuckling.
"I have it, but I do not mind doing more crazy .-
-Jason." I said turning to see in the eyes .- We can not, I can not ... There is still some time ... First go to my aunt Meredith, finish the school year and I'm going to ... Internship .-
"I will not vayas. you" He said taking my hand.
"We talked about it Jason ... .. Imposible. Es-Said a voice.
...- Melanie whispered.
-Jason. "I replied.
"I've been thinking .. y. .. This is the last time that I have to tell you ... I do not want you to go without knowing .-
- What do you mean? .-
-Melanie ... I ..- My heart pounded in a measured rhythm.
- Mel! .- Madison shouted in the distance.
- If Jason? .- Asked.
-N-Nothing ..- said rolling his eyes.
-Mel, I'm sorry is that I have to talk to you, is very important! .- Madison took me by the hand, and Jason let me gently.
-Jason ... At ten in the parque.-whispered before leaving. Do not know was happening, or that time had come to this but I would avoid.
"Sorry Mel. Madison He apologized so giddy.
"Do not worry though .- I said I really cared.
"It wanted to know if we could leave tomorrow ... You know ... Like I said you ..- as pitiful.
"I can not .. I'll morning." I said biting my lip.
"Okay ... But Mel, you know I miss you right? Call .. Will you do it? .- Said pleadingly.
"Every semana.-sighed, smiling.
"For your bien." shouted Stephanie .- But ... Let not your casa. dawn-said-Secuestro.-hummed laughs.
-Uy is scary .- I said dramatically.
-Ja, ja-Sea I hope he laughed in unison.
We talked all afternoon, a mixture of nostalgia was in me, I had to fight back the tears with great effort, she could not continue like this ...
not take long to find pretexts for wriggle out of my two friends and I go back to the safety of the walls of my room.
I stared at everything that was there, playing around, recording in my memory.
- Mel? .- Said Amy shrill voice behind me.
- What do you want? .- I said with contempt.
-Y-...- I answered I apologize.
aquí. -outta-the burst.
"But Mel ...-
" There are no buts in this conversación.-sentencing.
Melanie much Would you mind turning to me? Or at least listen ...- said imploringly.
I do not want to see you, tomorrow I will go and the only good thing is that I can see you leave without seeing nuevamente. "I said.
"Listen .-
- What I have to hear? Wait .. I know! How do you tell the whole school what happened to Jason or the other thing that I still have not heard? How wonderful to have a spy in your own home! .- I said sarcastically.
Melanie was not my intention to hurt .-
- No? And then, tell me Amy, what exactly was that you said everything to Natalie? .- I asked angrily.
"Because ... Understand me you'd done the same ...- apologized.
- Oh! Really? .- I replied .- No Amy! And you know why I would never do something like that? Not because I fall right, and not because we are familiar Do not think that's why! But because I, Amy, I know a term that you would be very useful to know and that is: Loyalty. And I'm loyal to the things I have taught, and to clean my room, being polite, especially the principles. My father and my mother how little they have been with me have taught me that I should not lie or harm people with stupid non important things. And maybe you do not already taught Amy, but your attitude and your future depends on how you live now Natalie Do you really think Steven is your friend? .- I said without mercy.
"Of course I ...-
- No Amy! .- Interrupted .- You're just an easy excuse to get to me, because if you had not noticed, I detest . You're a tool, a pawn of his game and as you live in my house is perfect. But you're too naive Amy.-Continue with anger, but I did, I held back to see a trace of tears in the eyes of Amy, as we finally saw the words penetrated his brain frivolous .- "I told Amy what siento. calmly .- But I can not do anything to avoid telling you this ... I do not know how to hate the day my father announced my departure to boarding school and as you smiled with pleasure at the news that it would destroy my life a little .- said a voice.
"I know I'm a bad person, and I have flaws but does not seem right that you began ...- Amy.
- Oh not Amy! Do not come with moral sermons you being the first in the house that lacks them, I'm not perfect, I accept that I have many flaws, but you Amy, knowing what my life is ruined now, and knowing that you have a percentage of guilty about it, do not have a better idea and worthy of you, to come to apologize and make victim at a time outside apparatus.Bubble increasingly despairing "I said more.
Amy did not answer, did not know whether out of discretion, or simply did not find that. And so it was better, I would continue talking and going crazy a little more if he continued replicating in the stupid way that he did, denying their actions already past the limit if my patience Strait.
- Did you finish? .- Asked dully.
"If Amy, terminé.-sighed.
-C-I think ... I'd better go ...- said in a trembling voice, I knew that any moment it would throw to mourn, perhaps by the end of my long and hard discourse, or theater just a formality.
I got rid of my shoes and I slammed into a fluffy pillow. Maggie would go with me to London, and not by a benevolent gesture towards me, but because my mother hated it openly.
cold in London would make a heartbreaking, so I had commissioned to buy winter clothes for both. Actually I had had a great proving to Maggie hundreds of adorable outfits and brightly colored or sober. From tailor-made shoes ordered from a store devoted to dogs, to hats and more. And as it was the only thing that could deal favorably for the trip I decided that at least would not be so bitter all the preparations. I also used it as an excuse to buy clothing atrocities of me, and my mother loved this type of waste, I not only support one hundred percent, but up from time to time, participated.
already had the painful task of packing tons of clothes for the entire December will happen there and shed bitter tears over the course of the work.
had cried a lot, and I tired of it. Going to abandon everything for a month forever, and I would return again to return.
was sure that in the process I fall apart, could not stand, sharp and deep pain that I started in two or more.
wanted someone to come, that I rebuilt. With a roll of tape wrap my heart. I was aware of someone who would want to do, but I would not let him, pride before it consumed me.
I stacked the boxes full of clothes and a few things in the corner of my room and threw myself on the floor curled up, tortured, in the midst of a nervous breakdown.
Stephanie, who was coming to my house to give me a parting gift, I found this in my room. She gently lifted me up while I, completely disoriented, crying on his shoulder.
With swollen eyes and face streaked with traces of tears, her cheeks red, Stephanie left me after several concerned calls from his mother.
I went to the mirror, and when I saw, I saw a radical change of the girl he had seen before the start of school ... I dug in my bathroom drawers looking for the photo she had taken of my appearance that day, and compare it to the mirror.
I took another photo, printed it and put them next to each other.
now had more swollen eyes, but that did not change much with the other, no longer had dark circles as well stamped purple, my hair had become an impenetrable tangle of loops that were definitely not before, and my expression had changed''soon I will cut off the veins girl tortured''a''away from society to enter into captivity.''
Eras eight in the evening, but still, I began to dress slowly and with a sadness that exceeded the limits of reality, to keep my appointment with Jason.
***
SIII not I have to say how happy I am ^ ^ Never had reached the 8 comments, but they believe? It was! So I flew like a plane to keep them the chap who had promised: D There were distractions .. Like I must admit that my two best friends kidnapped me to see Toy Story 3 (aww) and I saw the expected beautiful maravillosisisima, ECLIPSE ♥ ♥ this definitely exceeded my expectations for a week to perfect: D then post them a little personal review ^ ^ pd. I hope this chapter has also muchitos comments porfiiiis that makes me feel proud: D
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